be careful on what you wish for

nature has it's own way of doing tricks on you.

sometime July 2007, i was on the verge of losing myself to work. and all i can wish for is for me to get sick so that i can take a leave. surprisingly, i was so in the pink of health despite countless sleepless nights and unhealthy working habits. strange. i know im becoming a pain in the ass to my friends since all i can tell them is how tired i am and how i hate my clients and how i'd love to get sick for at least a week, if getting sick is the only way i could take a rest. poor me.

amazingly, the only way i can relieve myself from stress is by jotting down my thoughts, be it sad or inspiring or funny. you can find it strange but how will you describe my roommate's unexplainable passion of buying curtains and then arranging it everytime she gets home? stress-booster, i know.

So here is my blog dated July something 2007.

Title: Work is consuming the best of me.

mich, get a life. that's the best advice i can give to myself. two of our best consultants have resigned and i got a share of their unfinished businesses in addition to my existing projects. there are times that i don't dream anymore. when you're busy you just face whatever comes in your way. kill whoever comes first. that's the Black-Ninja theory i learned from one of my clients.

According to him when black ninjas are coming to destroy you, don't panic.

just focus.

look at them in the eye.

ninjas will attack you one at a time, so make sure you hit them in their vital parts.

so they won't come back again.

before you knew it they are all black ants lying on the ground.then victory is all yours!

In my simultaneous stints to different corporate clients that i'm currently handling, i met new faces, said "hi" to different corporate cultures, embraced new operating styles, dealt with mind-boggling queries and came up with informed decisions.

Okay, let me introduce to you some of my memorable clients:

Company No. 1: Ethics-Lacking Corp. This is a haven of good meryenda. You can eat at your workstation and if by some clumsiness it spills... Ooopps... it's okay. the pests will come but they definitely know their way out.Don't worry.

Company No. 2: Hitler Corp. I did a product demo to the company President and his consultant and believe me i haven't felt humiliated like that in my whole life.
"What? The software is from the US and you're telling us it cannot do the inter-company consolidation?" - yah right, am i the maker of that ERP?? (am i blushing?)
"Ask your boss... maybe you just simply don't know about that feature" - (wait, i wanna puke...)
"Come back again next week and present to us our pending issues" - oh yeah?? (eyes-rolling) talking about two thrill-seeker, chauvinist pigs.

Company No. 3: Warm Teletubbies Corp. The office is somewhere in Sucat, Paranaque. I gave them a training for 3 days and it's like the best performance of my life as a Business Consultant. It was superb! Surreal! Sublime! It's like the confirmation of all my hard work. They never ran out of words to appreciate what i did for them and i know for sure that they learned a great deal from my training.

Company No. 4: Come What may Corp. A company whose footwear products i admired but working with them is as good as testing the weather everyday, and every decision is seemingly dependent on a toss coin. How discouraging. Apparently, the project didn't prosper. Blame the project manager-tosser.

*****
End of flashback..... zooommmm....

Now i have a clear image of me taking a deep breath, eyes wide shut and asking the good Lord to give me a break or I WOULD QUIT.

The Lord took a sigh and said: "my child, honestly, you are a bitch. but i love you and i don't want you to quit so i'll take care of the next few days. don't worry now."

looking back what happened to me... it happened so fast. without me seeing the signs. my stars perfectly aligned. from the day i got my precious million-dollar-worth US tourist visa, til the day i transferred to my new work... everything is so perrrrrffecccttt!!!!!

good pay.
flexible working hours, 8 by 5.
brilliant co-workers.
travel opportunities.
wear-whatever-you-feel-like-as-long-as-it's-decent dresscode.
stress-free environment.
free unlimited coffee.
what more can i ask for?

but have you ever realized that it's not just how much you take home every payday?

i just asked for a twig and what was given to me is a tree.
i asked for a week off and what was given to me was 6 months stress-free and lax circumstance.

Okay God, i know the lessons now.

It's not the money that would matter.
It's your worth as a person.
It's the challenges that you conquer.
It's your impact to others' lives.

For the meantime, i will devote my freedom to discover the movie industry and connect again to my old friends, sort of renewing our friendship vows.

Who knows, after a few months, work will consume again the best of me. :D